Seven.Caged.Tigers

This season’s America’s Next Top Model is now well underway. The first episode was aired last week. I usually do my rundowns prior to that episode but I’m only getting around to it now. There are thirteen new chicks in the house. There will be the usual drama, the usual backstories, and the usual mayhem. It’s bound to be a great time.

Before I talk about the first episode I want to go over the girls a little. Here goes nothing.

	A.J. A “rocker chick” if I’ve ever seen one. She’s got that short, spiky black hair on her side. She’s also gorgeous. Unfortunately for UPN, they haven’t released the girls’ height. I’m thinking she’s one of the shorter girls this season, but that means very little in a field where there are girls who are 6′1″. I like her–her face will take her far.
	AmandaOne of the twins, she’s tall and quirky looking. She and her sister both remind me of Shandi (Season 3) though maybe slightly more balanced and graceful. I think she could surprise us this season if the stars align in a certain way. That said, I think Michelle is the more striking twin.
	AnchalEvery year, fans seem to fixate on one face. This year it is Anchal. I honestly don’t think she is that gorgeous. She actually scares me a bit. Plus, I think (at least according to pre-show photos) she is a little chubby in “top model” terms to be among the top few faces. Time will tell, but she’s definitely not my choice.
	BrookeLooking for that all-American look? This young model could be your bag. She’s blonde, she’s cute, and she’s apparently amiable. None of this matters, of course, if she can’t take a good photo. I think she is pretty, but of course being a looker is of no real bearing on a game when all your competition are also lookers.
	CariDeeWow does this one look like runner-up Shannon from Season 1. She’s almost certainly not as Christian as her predecesor so she won’t be around for much drama. She is however the one suffering from a horrible skin disease. Psoriasis. That was my attempt at sarcasm. Truth be told, until they get a girl with a real disease on the show (like, oh, cancer–and still bald from chemo) will I even consider somebody vaguely sick. Oh well. At least she is pretty.
	ChristianSpeaking of pretty, Christian is probably the most traditionally gorgeous. Her features are delicate and her overall appearance is sweet. Will this carry her through to the finals? I seriously doubt it. Pretty, as I mentioned above, is never enough.
	EugenaI don’t think I’ve ever called a girl ugly in one of these pre-show rundowns, but Eugena is seriously fugly. She does’t have a neck, is plain, and has horribly horrible helmet hair. I can understand why she was chosen and her body is fine enough but seriously ANTM, can’t you do better than this?
	JaedaOnce upon a time we had Coryn (Season 5) who had serious drag characteristics. This season we have Jaeda. She’s supposed to be tall (like 6′1″) and appears to be physically fit for modelling. Unfortunately her face leaves something to be desired. It’s like she’s a wax sculpture. Bah. I can’t even look at her any more.
	MeganI like Megan. I like her cherubic face. I like her pout. I like her skin. I generally adore the way she looks. This one could definitely go far in the competition. Unfortunately, she was chosen in part for her drama. She was in a plane accident and survived because her mother died on top of her. Sounds like a soap opera, eh? Good thing she can back her story up with smashingly gorgeous good looks.
	Megg“Rock n’ Roll!!!!!” Errrr. Not. She has a weird hook nose (you can’t see it in these photos, but when she smiles or screams it is totally there). She is also waaaaay thin. Tyra makes a point of saying that her girls aren’t the usual standard for top models. They are slightly meatier. Megg is a stick figure. An average looking one at that.
	MelroseHer real name is Melissa Rose. She goes by Melrose because she doesn’t have time for all that other crap. How very trite. She’s also 23 years old and looks every bit that age. Obviously she’s spent some time in the sun. She is pretty and stuff but she looks more like a trade show model than a top model in my opinion. I suspect she’ll last until about mid-season despite her flaws. Plus, she’s trying to be a mom in the house which always makes for good drama. Ty-ty likes drama.
	MichelleThe other twin. I actually think she’s the prettier twin, but it’s hard to say since they are indeed identical. Time will tell who has the real skills, but something about her physicality and grace is more alluring than her more girly sister. I’m curious to see how this whole twin thing plays out this season.
	Monique“The bitch.” Every house has to have one. This one is probably right up there with Robyn (or Robin, Robynne, etc.). She is definitely gorgeous and looks like a lady, but I think she photographs somewhat plainly. There’s something to be said for being quirky.

So that’s the rundown. Like I said, the first episode aired. We saw the semi-finalists who were flown to L.A. for evaluation. The girls got off the plane and were immediately photographed. Then they were further whittled down and photographed again.

The second set of pictures was pretty controversial. Tyra and co. asked the girls to strip and be photographed. I guess she was trying to eliminate the problems of other seasons (like when Shannon refused to get nekkid, etc.). It worked. This one chickie (a young, former republican page) refused to strip. When she finally did they only got two shots. Ginger was obviously eliminated. Tyra doesn’t stand for insubordination. The finalists moved into the house (which is, this season, adorned with countless images of their mentor). They had a challenge that Melrose won. We learned more about the girls and then they were off to their first real photo shoot–all about model stereotypes. We had the diva, the girl with her lap dog, the anorexic, the casting couch, the bulimic, the cell phone thrower, the black girl they were trying to make white, the narcissist and many others. It was interesting enough. I liked how a few photos were actually disturbing–does that mean this season will be edgy? Who knows.

Here are a few of my favorites, least favorite, and the elimated:

AJ - On the “Casting Couch”

Michelle - The Bulimic

Eugena - AWFUL photo

Christian - The Elimated Girl

I can’t wait for next week!

An observation about my son. He has no hair…remember the rhyme?

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear

Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair

Fuzzy wuzzy wasn’t fuzzy was he?

I think my son is Fuzzy Wuzzy the bear. Seriously. I have no doubt that eventually he will grow a little more on the top (if you’ve met my husband you’d understand why this is a given), but it’s kind of sad now. He will certainly need a little more insulation this winter. The tiniest bit would suffice. Of course eventually he’ll have a fur coat, furry butt, furry head, etc… (and boy do I mean “etc”).

I will say the fuzz is getting ever so slightly longer. Slowly.

With my computer currently out of the picture, I’ve not added any baby photos.  Your wait has now been rewarded.  Here are brand new portraits of Zack.  They are from his four month sitting yesterday.  Of course he’s basically five months now, but all is well.  And if you had any doubt that he’s the cutest baby in the world…

You know me.  I don’t believe in any gods.  That said, the god of all things computin’ has taken away my laptop.  Hence the lack of new Zack photos for the past week and a half.  The computer is at Best Buy being fixed.  I could do it myself, but because I have the plan (you know, the one that has replaced my computer once and given it two new motherboards) that gets things fixed when need be.  Damn.  It takes a long time.

I’m filling my time now with selling shiznit on Half.com.  I have like 300 CDs, 20 music video/concert DVDs, and even one (gasp!) book listed.  So far I’ve made like $50 off of crap I got for free from various people (both friends and foes).  I’m even selling good stuff, it’s just I don’t need three of any one CD regardless of how good it is.  I think I even had four copies of some titles.  No joke.

I’m so grubby. JT and I (not to mention Zack) just returned from our annual trip to Mackinaw City and the Labor Day festivities. Needless to say, I now would highly recommend that nobody bring their infant camping. We have a tent, no luxuries, and little buddy wasn’t particularly happy about the whole situation. What fun, seriously, hours upon hours of blood-curdling wailing is enough to drive any otherwise stable parent batty. By the way, Zack also walked the bridge with his daddy.
Here are but a few photos that prove we were there…